8.21.2011

Sundays...

...are very emotional days in my transition. For some reason right in the middle of church at the height of a message or during a song I am always on the verge of crying. I am trying to pinpoint why this might be... especially since I have not been a huge crier.
...maybe after living in China for 7 years and being restricted from using 'Christian words' and now being able to really freely worship with soooo many churches to choose from - this could be one reason
...or maybe because it's been such a long time from hearing really good messages in person. I often listened to chapel messages from my alma-mater or other preachers on podcasts. There's something about hearing from someone in person that has studied and it's their job to communicate truth
...or worshipping with incredible music - full bands and a choir
...or maybe the music brings back memories from my time overseas.
...or it could be because I look so American but feel so different inside that it's hard to find a "church" family to fit in with
So far this summer I've been able to keep the tears in. Today, however, they couldn't be stopped. The church I've been going to took a Sunday to highlight some of the community and overseas ministries that have been taking place recently.
- One young girl was baptized and I couldn't help but think about when I was baptized in the Pacific Ocean.
- A slide show highlighted ministries going on to help Haitian earthquake victims - and after our 8.0 Sichuan, China earthquake - this of course brought back many painful memories
- Then the song at the end of the sermon talked about God being Mighty to Save...this was the theme of the trip we took our 11th -12th grade students on a trip to Tibet where we saw people that start in their hometown and literally prostrate themselves all the way to Lhasa. They prostrate themselves by taking 3 steps and then gliding their hands and body to the ground so their foreheads touch (you can see an indent)...and Tibet is at an extremely high altitude with many mountains.
There's so much to process...I think I could write a book.
For now I'll leave it at this post.

7.25.2011

Did you know...

that in the South they hug a lot? I didn't ever realize this!!!
Since one of my top love languages is physical touch this is great and confusing all at one time! I love the hugs...but it's strange to hug someone when I hardly know them. It communicates to me that they are close friends and want to spend time together. When actually the Southerner giving the hug only means it like "Hey, how are you?"
I'll still take a hug any day! :)

6.15.2011

Things that are amazing about returning to the states...

...in no particular order:
1. Blue skies EVERYday
2. Sunshine
3. Stars that are visible
4. Clean everything it seems - like bathrooms & nature, there's no black layer of smog dust visible
5. Air conditioning
6. Easy to clean and eat fruit and veggies - no more soaking in bleach water to kill germs
7. Drinking water out of the tap
8. Ice cubes for beverages
9. Free refills
10. Orderly roads and traffic
11. Nice rest stops with no squatty potties
12. Freedom to worship God and speak of Him without using a code
13. Dryers
14. Carpet and vacuum cleaners
15. Fresh deli sandwiches
16. Avocado
17. Fresh whole wheat bread
18. Family nearby

6.10.2011

Almost Trapped in China?

This post is from the States - PTL - after a very different journey than originally planned! [Isn't that often how life is - different than we plan? :)]
June 7th, my friend Amanda came to help me and say goodbye. A lot of our foreign team had already left Chengdu for their summer home. My house helper (aka maid but she's a dear Aunt to me) came as well to help me with last minute cleaning. She carried both pieces of my heavy luggage down 4 flights of stairs (two trips). This was so nice because it's so hot and humid and there's nothing like being sweaty before a long 24 hour + trip. Mr. Bao (my hired airport driver) took me and my friend Bethany to the airport. Along the way I was rather sentimental thinking back on past trips to the airport when I travelled to other places in China as well as Thailand and the Philippines.
Once we arrived in Beijing we had a very short layover, so we made our way to the gate. Once arriving at the desks where you show your VISA and departure card, the lady at the desk looked at me and said in minimal English - your VISA has expired. My heart started to pound faster. In my mind I'm thinking, "What? no way! I'm leaving China!" She then ushers me over to another desk in which another lady says, "Your VISA expired." I wait while the officers talk. Then a man says to me, "Your VISA has expired." By this time I'm thinking, "Hello people, I know already, tell me what I need to do so I can make my flight in 10 short minutes!" I'm at this point trying so hard not to cry and seem like I'm a wreck. The one severe looking lady then says to me and NOTE I will NEVER EVER forget this moment. She says, "We will punish you!"
My brain starts to think, "Punish? What kind of punishment - jail and a a beating with a bamboo stick?" Then the other man says, "You will have to pay a fine." I ask how much to which he gives me an estimate - no 'rule' for how much anyone would have to pay if their VISA expires. He says that it will probably cost 3,000 yuan ($500-600), and so I asked where an ATM machine is. He says there is one at the front of the airport - mind you this is THE Beijing airport - no small place. HUGE - so big they had to take the earth's curvature into consideration when building it because it's that long. I start running and sweating of course because they barely run the AC...lugging my laptop and loaded purse. I have no cell phone and of course no Chinese money on me - I was LEAVING with no intention to return. At this point I'm debating with myself if there is any possible way I'll make it back to the exit to catch my flight. I knew I wouldn't deep down, but I sure wanted to 'try.'
After getting money out - I realized I wouldn't make it for sure because the ATM lets you withdraw only 2,500 and I needed 3,000. I made my way (still sweating) to one ticket counter asking in Chinese how to change tickets and explaining my circumstance. I did this several times at different counters until I found an angel at one counter. She helped me and finally explained how the rules for a VISA expiration work. Basically you get 10 free days (mine had expired May 23rd). Then after that they charge 500 yuan per day. She told me she could change my flight to the next day but that would cost 800. So on top of the change I would have to pay about 3,000 to leave the country. Nothing like paying to leave a country! Thankfully she let me use her phone and PTL I had kept a staff contact list. I called my former principal for a friend in Beijing's number. Got a place to stay with some great girls...lost power and water that night...typical. :) Then the next day made the long flight back to the States. PTL that the next day went so smoothly. I could tell people were praying - what a crazy 42 hours or so!

6.06.2011

Bags Packed and the Long Trip 'Home'

My bags are packed - two suitcases with the few things I decided to lug back to the States with me. The flight path I will take will be Chengdu to Beijing, Beijing to JFK in NY, then NY to Charlotte, NC. Soon I will be back on American soil looking like an American but feeling very different inside.

6.05.2011

One more night...

Now it has hit me – I am leaving – my apartment is empty! I have one more night here, and my stomach is in knots after all the goodbyes and last minute errands and packing. I attended my last church service here (also called Fellowship). They had a special goodbye service for those of us leaving. Over the past 2 months the Fellowship hasn’t been able to meet because of some higher up (aka Chinese govt.) decisions. I can’t go into details, but we haven’t had our usual Sunday meetings. So this last big meeting was held in a hotel conference room. Afterwards I ate one last meal at a favorite western restaurant – a normal Sunday tradition – lots of memories talking over meals with friends after Fellowship. I will miss these times so much!

6.04.2011

The Movers are Here!

Today the movers from Sante Fe came to my apartment. Yay, one more item checked off of the "To-Do List."
Here they are packing: